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Birthday Jokes

When you get to a certain age, all birthdays feel like jokes, like the universe is pointing at you and laughing. Before that, it’s all fun and games and you actually look forward to them. Birthdays come every once in a blue moon and they are to be celebrated. As you age, they’re something you want to hide from, run from and preferably beat to a bloody pulp if you can.

Or maybe that’s just me. Anyway, here are some birthday jokes to try and cheer up other grumpy so-and-sos like me.

Birthday Jokes

If you like these birthday jokes then there’s a good chance you will get a kick out of some of our other joke pages, not all of which are made for miserable age haters like myself.

Check with our Parenting Jokes, Dating Jokes and, well, whatever. I’m depressed because I’ve been thinking about aging. Do what you want, I’m going to eat some cake and try to forget how old I am.

#1

Funny Birthday Jokes

Another reminder of how old I am, because everything except rice gives me heartburn. When you get to a certain age food is not a friend, it’s an enemy that is always trying to screw you over.

#2

Funny Birthday Joke

#3

Free Birthday Jokes

Or buy a calendar, because you know, that would be a lot easier and it might end up saving your marriage.

#4

Birthday Jokes Picture

There is borderline racist and then there is just, well, racist, Someone needs to tell our researchers what the line is and then push them back over it, because they have crossed it a few times on this site.

#5

Best Birthday Jokes

Forget about kale and chia seeds, it turns about that birthdays are the best thing for you. Who knew.

#6

Very Funny Birthday Joke

If you make a habit of befriending babies then you’re going to have some angry parents and some very suspicious police officers asking you questions. The free cake really isn’t work it.

#7

Short Birthday Jokes

But then again the same can be said for vodka, and that doesn’t stop me from downing bottle after bottle until I forget how old I am.

#8

Long Birthday Jokes

#9

LOL Birthday Jokes

#10

Hilarious Birthday Jokes

A classic dad joke. I think the reason I am so grumpy is because my dad used to make jokes like this all of the time about me.